5 graff

      There are lots of reasons i joined martial arts to begin with. It wasn't a whim like when i tried out for football. I was always watching movies with people like Bruce Lee, Jacky Chan, And Jet Lee. I wanted to meet them and learn some of their qualities. When i saw how they all had great self esteem and confidence i wanted to gained some of that myself. I thought martial arts would teach me a lot about myself and also teach me how to hold my head high. This was my first reason for getting into martial arts. Another reason was I wanted to learn how to defend the people i love with and without violence. Another reason was I have a lot of fears also like when i see spiders. I know this is funny but i want to overcome those fears and be courageous. I thought martial arts would help lead me to build the adaptation or courage so i could have some. I was on a mission to achieve it. So i loved it when were able to grapple or spar in my judo and jue-jitsu class. I was really good at grappling to the point where they always put me against my sensi.

      What i wanted to be the first thing i accomplish was holding my head high and having good self esteem. When i fist started the class my teacher or sensi made a few rules very clear. There is no such thing as i cant do this. He didn't want us to use the word cant. We also were not aloud top beat our self's up with negativity. We had every right to hold out heads high and be all we can be. We are all unique. He not only preached this and drilled it into my head, but every time i would go against the rules i had to do bear crawls and workouts. this action and also being told im the only one that can judge myself helped me gaine what i wanted and that is self confidence. 

      When i look and see all of the fighting not only in movies but my friends and family getting into fights and i cant do anything about it. It makes me mad and frustrated to the point where i wanted to learn how to defend myself and the ones i love with and without violence. My sensi taught us both the non combative versions of throws and the combative style throw. He would go over different scenarios and how to not only avoid them but if it happened, how to defend it. My favorite exersize was whats called round robin. It was where i would stand in the middle surrounded my people with guns, knifes, and other weapons with my eyes closed. Then he would send one person at me and say go i would only have a second to react to find the enemy and disarm them. This not only made me feel like i could defend the ones i love, it gave me the skills i needed to defend them. 

      After i accomplish two of my goals all that was left was to over come some of my fears if not all of them. When i asked my sensi to help me with over coming my fears he helped me in a weird way. i said i was afraid of the dark and he showed me a path i could take home that was safe after class but dark. After walking that path home after class every night i got accustomed to the dark and was no longer afraid of it. i always wanted to learn how to do a back hand spring but was to scared to fall on my head. he showend me what to do and then he said do it. I learned how to flip in one day. the only fear i was not able to shake was spiders i hate them with every fiber of my being. In a sence i accomplished my goals.

      When i think back to how i would act before i did martial arts and the qualities i have always wanted it feels like a dream. I would always either get a ride home or sprint because i was scared of the dark now i just stroll home. I go to school with my head held high and dont care what people think about. i also am able to defend myself and others. It all adds into what i went through martial arts. It may of taken me over four years of throws grappling and dedication to class. In the long run when i see someone start to swing at my friends i can defend them. i can walk in the dark. i also can keep my head high. Im glad i took martial arts.